Parenting, Thoughts and Feelings

Week before Lunar New Year

It’s a week before Lunar New Year. 5am as I compose this blog post. Both my children are down with flu virus. They were fed paracetamol at 4am and I cannot sleep after that. While the whole family knows that the virus came from my niece who was put into preschool by one of her parents in early Jan, no one talked about it. I did; I could not resist.

While the traditional family I married into has a culture of keeping quiet about sensitive issues, I’m the odd ball that voices them out as I believe keeping quiet doesn’t help one learn. Starting my niece in Preschool in Jan when Lunar New Year is slightly after mid Jan, was an idea I was against, but had no say in. True to my worry, now all kids are sick and adults are having flu symptoms. Great! Just great!

It’s very difficult for a planner like me to accommodate situations like these when I associate the cause to an action which was not thought through clearly. What was worse was, the action has caused inconvenience to others and no apology or any form of act to show regrets (eg volunteering to keep my niece away from my kids) was shown.

I am expected to be gracious in the name of the family culture. I am not. Not because my kids are affected, but because it was an act of foolishness and irresponsible actions after the incident caused others pain.

Any parent would know how tiring and worrying it is to have two young children with flu and one having symptoms of high and stubborn fever. Sponging a child that refuses to let you, feeding medicine to a whining child, having to accompany the child all day seeing him feel lethargic, is so tiring and worrying for the parents.

The different perspectives of mine and niece’s parent has caused unhappiness within me. It’s not about who was right or who was wrong, it’s a matter of perspective and personality. Many told me I am too much of a perfectionist.

I will let go. It’s God’s will and His test for me. I have to learn to be more graceful and accept things that come my way. And I have to drop my ego!


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