A dear friend lamented today, that her children who are now young adults do not update her about their whereabouts. I recalled I didn’t like to inform my Mum about my whereabouts when I was about their age too, and thought it was natural.
A while later, her boy messaged her about where he was going tonight. She showed me the message and placed her handphone back into her handbag. I was a little puzzled and asked “don’t you want to reply?”. It occurred to me that not replying to acknowledge or show concern may be discouraging her kids from informing her about their whereabouts, and I shared my view. She wasn’t sure if my guess was right, and tested it out by giving her boy a reply “take care”.
I am not sure if I am right too but I thought giving a reply was a form of courtesy to our family members and friends, so why not to our children? I hope to remind myself to maintain a friendship with my children as they grow and as I change my parenting style to cater to their age groups. I take this opportunity to remind myself not to have a one-way reprimanding style of discipline.